Scars
by wicked-nachos-09
Summary: JJ shows Emily that sometimes it's okay to let someone else have control. Set after 5x10 Slave of Duty, established JJ/Emily. Smut.


Smut. That's all this is. Basically.

Also I have a bet going. If I get more than 25 reviews in the first week of this being posted, there will be more smut. Probably following on from the ending. It's up to you guys.

Don't die, please take a cold shower if need be. Enjoy.

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><p>Emily had been deliberately avoiding the blonde, from the moment their Unsub had been cuffed and directed towards the closest Police cruiser, despite the fact that JJ had in fact been safely tucked away at the local station they were using as a base of operations. It was a struggle not to avoid eye contact with Morgan and Rossi, as they headed for the SUV to go back to the station, so she wouldn't give anything away. Over the years she had become an expert at guarding herself, and today would be no exception, but the familiarity of the situation these women had found themselves in before their untimely deaths was frightening to the profiler. It reminded her of how close she had once come to ending up like them.<p>

The flight home had been worse, with the entire team shutting themselves off from each other as usual, into separate corners of the aircraft cabin, to process and attempt to mould these horrors into something they could understand, intellectually and emotionally. Emily had tried her hardest to focus on the words the page in front of her held, but half an hour rereading the same lines over and over again proved that it wasn't working. JJ was sitting across from her, pretending to sift through other case files, occasionally glancing up from the folder to risk a glance at Emily. Derek had explained everything that had happened at the scene, including Emily's speech directed at the man in cuffs. To say she had been shocked was an understatement, and her answer when asked moments later if she knew what it was in reference to, had been an honest 'no'.

She had felt slightly disappointed that she wasn't aware of what was going on with her girlfriend, and was mulling it over as her eyes tickled the page, the information barely registering in her mind. Sure, they weren't very far into their relationship and they both still had a lot to learn about the other, but up until that point, the two of them had been very open with their feelings and emotions. They had even gone as far as to begin divulging their histories to each other. The next time she looked up, JJ couldn't help but keep her gaze on the brunette. Emily had given up trying to read one of her favourite novels, and the book was buried underneath her arms, as they rested folded on top of the small table, her head hidden in the crook of her elbow while she was hunched forward. As she watched for a moment, she couldn't help but let her thoughts continue to wander and guess the reasons for Emily's sudden fear.

It was well after one am when they finally re-entered D.C. air space, lights of the buildings, monuments and memorials shining up at them calmly as they flew over. Emily had disappeared the moment the plane had come to a stop on the tarmac, cracking her back as she stretched and headed straight for her own car on the other side of the hanger. She needed to escape. The memories were flooding her vision and it was the only thing she could think about, despite her best efforts to ignore them. They all had bad cases, ones that affected them more directly than others. This just happened to be one of Emily's. JJ figured that she shouldn't smother the other woman, that she would come to her when she was ready. It didn't stop the craving she had to find Emily and hold her, planning to never let go, and to chase all of her demons away.

The blonde hadn't been planning to get much sleep, she still had several files to read through that she had neglected on the flight home before she could curl up under the covers. JJ was suddenly glad that Strauss had agreed to give them the day off as an extra incentive during her persuasion to convince them to leave Haley's wake. She had been expecting a call from Emily later in the day, not for her to knock on her door this late at night. The brunette hadn't changed from her work clothes, making her stand out against the warm, homey atmosphere of JJ's living room, and the casualness of JJ's attire – a messy bun with a comfortable tank top and sweats.

JJ could see the toll the sudden bout of stress having on Emily. It was simply the cause of the stress that had her stumped. She looked exhausted, and close to a break down. So helping the woman out of her jacket and shoes, and leading her to the overstuffed couch, was the instinctual thing for JJ to do. With her legs tucked under her body, and her chin sitting on her knee, JJ fiddled with Emily's fingers, to stop the woman from doing it herself, and to provide a connection between the two of them. Just so Emily would _know _that JJ was right there _with her_. The media liaison waited patiently as Emily sorted her mind out, opening and closing compartments trying to find the right way of saying what she needed to get off her chest. She could feel Emily becoming more and more closed off the longer they sat there in silence. "If you don't want to talk about it, then you don't have to tell me."

Emily simply nodded and went along with the process of settling the house for the night, or what was left of it anyways. Turning the lights off and triple checking locks and windows had become a natural habit for JJ not long after Elle had been shot, and she took to the regular activity on autopilot after gently pushing Emily towards the stairs to get changed for bed. They both needed some sleep, a chance to recharge and process just a little more. Once her routine was complete, JJ padded into her bedroom to find Emily sitting on the bed, staring at the floor blankly as her index finger traced over a small patch of skin on her left arm. The blonde secured her service weapon in her safe, resting Emily's on top after taking it from its resting place on the dresser, where it had been waiting. She still hadn't gotten changed. JJ sat as close as she dared and pressed her lips to the scar Emily had been ghosting over on her arm. That was when her blockage dissipated and the words began to flow freely.

"He was always so charming, and confident. I was never quite sure how I ended up being the one he wanted," she started, furrowing her brow and swallowing. JJ sat there silently, trying to keep her emotions from being displayed on her face, as she listened to Emily explain the failed and frightening relationship she had experienced during her sophomore year at Yale in a broken voice. Emily went on to tell the blonde how she related to these women, these victims, from their last case. She knew what it felt like to be controlled and always fearful that one wrong word, a look in the wrong direction, a plea for help, would result in a stinging slap or the angry threat of a painful beating. He had always gotten what he wanted, no matter what. JJ wanted to murder the man responsible for breaking her.

JJ was struggling to keep her expression neutral, but she knew that if Emily were to look up, the brunette would be able to see her thoughts swimming in her eyes. There were several times where she had encouraged Emily to continue her story, to vent her emotions with a well times kiss to the back of her knuckles or to her cheek. The two of them had barely had a handful of intimate experiences with each other, both more content to cuddle on the couch with pizza and a cheesy movie after a hard case, or occasionally make out like a pair of horny teenagers. Emily managed to tell JJ of the difficulty she had had escaping the manipulation and controlling atmosphere of her relationship. It had left her with scars, and serious repercussions when she even considered doing anything sexual with anyone.

JJ now understood why Emily had been reluctant to let her fingers exploring her most personal area, to bring the brunette to her release, saying that watching JJ had been more than enough. Sure, Emily had reached a climax, but it was usually in a cold shower and to her own hand. The profiler had hit a block when she tried to explain that to JJ. Despite multiple flings over the years, and one night stands, none of them had ever actually touched Emily. She had always been in control of her body since she escaped from him and that was how she liked it; she took pride in that fact. Since starting her relationship with JJ though, she had found it becoming increasingly difficult to maintain the same level of self control around the blonde. Emily understood clearly that she was comparing the monster responsible for her doubts to a caring, loving woman; they were two completely different people. But that still didn't stop her hesitation. It was her survival skills kicking in, she couldn't help it. She had taken a chance at being happy with JJ, she didn't want to ruin in it with her insecurities.

JJ sighed and began to prepare her own speech as Emily finished and looked away, almost ashamed. "Emily. Your thoughts and whatever issues you may have, you don't need to hide them from me. If you're uncomfortable with something we're doing or something we're not doing, all you have to is talk to me." Emily refused to meet her eyes; the gentleness of JJ's voice feeling like it was only a trap, a way to lure her in with a false of security. Emily nodded and sighed heavily. "I just don't know how to let someone else have control, I don't know how to give it up, and I've gotten so used to depending on myself."

JJ accepted the answer, and stood from her seat on the bed, intertwining their fingers just to keep a small connection with her lover. Standing in front of Emily, JJ's fingers hooked underneath the brunettes chin, forcing their eyes to meet. She could see the fear in the deep brown orbs, and JJ offered a soft smile while pushing some straightened hair out of Emily's face. "I won't push. When you're ready." The blonde could feel the tension roll off of Emily, as arms wrapped around her waist and her head came to rest on her stomach. Fingers sifted through the long hair and relieved a little more tension, scratching her. "I think it's time for bed."

JJ moved towards the bathroom, after pressing a kiss to the crown of Emily's head and ruffling her hair softly. There was a brief moment where JJ could hear the thoughts flying through her girlfriends mind as she pulled away. She was proud of Emily, and the progress she had made to let her walls down. It was one of the biggest things she had ever revealed to JJ, next to the abortion she had admitted having when she was fifteen. She made her nightly routine a speedy one, already halfway through the door before her handtowel could settle on the railing. She was desperate to simply have Emily in her arms. Barely a foot back into her bedroom and she stopped dead in her tracks, her eyes widened and her jaw dropped.

Emily stood there, her nervousness obvious on her face as her black shirt hung from her fingers, the cuffs dragging across the carpet next to her discarded heels. The deep blue material of her bra stood out against her pale skin, and JJ swallowed thickly to stop herself from drooling. She couldn't remember Emily ever being that forward during their relationship. Her eyes glided over her girlfriend's taut body, and she edged forward cautiously, not wanting to scare Emily aware. "Em?"

"I'm ready now," she whispered. In her mind, Emily was shaking and scared but she had made up her mind during the few minutes JJ had been in the bathroom. She wanted to give herself wholeheartedly to the other woman, and Emily had decided to do just that, physically and emotionally. She gasped lightly; JJ's cool hands met her stomach unexpectedly as she looked like a kid on Christmas. The hands on her stomach shifted to grip her hips and pulled her into JJ's body, a small curtain of blonde hair obscuring her peripheral vision. JJ nuzzled the offered cheek, Emily revelled in the feeling of JJ's breasts pushing against her own and the material of the tank top against the bare skin of her stomach. She had to hold back a moan at the raw intimacy of their position.

"Are you sure, baby?" Emily nodded her head, unable to find her voice. JJ's hands on her hips were distracting her. The brunette remembered her ability to move; she brought her hands up, one resting just below JJ's collar bone and the other cupping her neck. Their lips met softly, both women pouring in as much emotion as they could, JJ trying to show Emily that it was okay to relinquish control every now and then, and that she could be trusted with something as important as this, and Emily attempting to push past her fears of getting hurt again. With Emily's hands cupping her face, JJ's tongue snuck out seeking entrance into the warm mouth beneath her own. If there was one thing she would never be able to get enough of, it would be Emily's open mouthed kisses.

Emily's body unexpectedly bucked forwards into JJ when nails scraped teasingly across her back, one hand slipping over her belt heading south. The cool metal chain of her handcuffs sitting at the small of her back felt like an ice cube was being pressed against her increasingly heated skin. They pulled back for oxygen when it became an issue, and their foreheads bumped together. JJ moved her hands to undo the case the cuffs were sitting in, the clip on the top popping open soundly. Besides the heavy breathing filling the room, the jingling of the chain shaking loudly and the soft slap of skin on skin, were the only other sounds to be heard. Emily had reached out and grasped the hand holding of the metal bracelets. "Use them."

JJ had to do a double take. She had thought that Emily had only wanted to allow JJ to take her, not to take her control from her. She was hesitant to have her girlfriend trapped, to chain her to the bed and in a way cause her some pain. "I want you to. I need you to, Jen." Emily pushed her lips to JJ's, taking her by surprise. "Please." The last thing she had ever expected to hear coming from Emily was her almost begging for pain. JJ never wanted to hurt the woman she cared about, but for some reason, she found herself agreeing to the request.

"Take this off first," JJ whispered. The least she could do was try to take the edge off of Emily's nervousness. She smirked in only a way that could make Emily's knees go weak, and she replied with a raised eyebrow. "I like this bra. This is my bra, and I don't to ruin in." Emily smiled sheepishly and hid her face in the crook of JJ's neck, nipping slightly after a few seconds. The blonde tilted her head back to give Emily more access and began walking her back towards the bed. When the back of her legs hit the bed frame, she pulled JJ back into a kiss, her fears momentarily taking over her emotions. "If you want me to stop, or slow down, just say so. I love you, Emily."

Emily nodded again, taking full control of her new found sense of initiative. The cuffs dropped onto the bed, and JJ soon followed, crawling above her as she slid backwards across the sheets. As soon as Emily was settled against the headboard, JJ was sitting in her lap and pulling at the tie holding her hair up. Emily was nipping at the volume of neck exposed to her, there was going to be a definite mark on JJ's skin in the morning. When their mouths met again, JJ's hands skated across Emily's back to unclasp the bra. With a gentle tug, a smirk grew across the blondes face and the straps slipped down the toned arms. JJ had to bite her lip to keep her gaze from dropping to the supple breasts in front of her.

Emily shook off the bra, letting it fall somewhere near her shirt on the floor before she reached up to pull the tank top over JJ's head, feeling the need to have skin to skin contact. JJ hadn't been wearing a bra. Her hands were running through blonde locks, lips beginning a trail down towards the valley between her breasts. A warm mouth closed around one nipple, Emily's tongue swirling over the tip when her teeth bit down gently. Her hand cupped the other breast, giving it close the same amount of attention. Emily hummed, sending soft vibrations through JJ, who let out a needy groan. The brunette simply grinned against the breast in her mouth.

Emily gave up on JJ's breasts reluctantly, the blonde had pulled back and her hands trailed down the muscled stomach to blindly work on undoing the belt as she was pulled into another kiss. The brunette giggled, actually giggled as JJ struggled to focus on what she was doing. JJ pulled back and began walking on her knees backwards. When she was far enough down the bed, her hands gripped the back of Emily's knees and pulled her down the mattress and lowered herself onto the body beneath her. There was the familiar clicking of the cuffs as JJ prepared them through muscle memory. She pulled back just to make sure. "I'm okay."

"Just remember if you want me to stop-." JJ was silenced with a kiss, and as her girlfriend was distracted, she locked one bracelet around one of the steel poles that composed the bed head. JJ was suddenly grateful for Garcia's help in choosing a new bed, although the idea of being cuffed to the bed hadn't crossed her mind. Emily's arm was guided up toward the bed head, and the second bracelet was secured around her wrist. She was now stuck. After the clicking stopped, JJ ended the kiss and took in the expression gracing Emily's features. There was fear written across her face, her eyes scrunched closed. "Baby, open your eyes." Brown orbs came into view. "I'm not him."

"I know. Just go slow. Please?" JJ nodded and rolled off of Emily to reach for her own cuffs that had been sitting on her bedside table. She locked Emily's free arm to the frame. Now Emily wouldn't be able to resist, or push her away. JJ was only worried that the fearful woman beneath her wouldn't be able to use her voice because she would be too scared. If she wasn't careful, this experience could do more damage than good. The blonde came back to her knees, working on the difficult task of getting the belt undone and sliding the slacks down the smooth, never-ending legs. Her fingers tickled the bottom of Emily's feet, reducing the tension that had begun growing between them.

They shared a smile as JJ removed her own pants. Now they were even, Emily wasn't alone in her exposure and hopefully it would help ease her nerves. JJ positioned herself to straddle low on Emily's stomach and licked her bottom lip at the sight before her. The brunette arched into the nails scaping along her ribs as JJ took her mouth with her own, her tongue once again seeking out Emily's. The blonde could hear Emily whimper and the clang of the metal jostling as she struggled against the restraints, desperate to touch JJ in any way. Going slow was taking too long for Emily, or at least that was what her body implied when she bucked into JJ's hips again.

JJ smiled into the kiss, her hands still skimming over the vast expense of skin, and continued to massage Emily's tongue. "Jayje," came out in a heavy breath from the profiler, as a leg landed between her own, applying a small amount of pressure. She really didn't want to scare Emily, but the wetness seeping through the material of her panties was driving JJ towards the edge. Their bodies became flattened against each other as JJ shimmied down, breaking the kiss and attaching her lips to Emily's neck, leaving a trail of kisses in her wake. Emily moaned when JJ's hot mouth took a nipple, sucking gently.

Emily's body was telling JJ that the brunette was craving more contact, that she was close to overcoming her fear and close to begging, but decided against it. She could probably get away with some more teasing, under the guise of letting her girlfriend becoming more accustomed the feeling of being restrained. Emily was breathing rather heavily as JJ continued to tease her, now lavishing the same amount of attention to the neglected breast, just as it had been done to her. JJ sat back up, her knee digging in against Emily's centre, resulting in a gasped exclamation of a swear word. She simply smiled as she came to straddle one of Emily's legs, rocking her hips back and forth as she felt her own wetness growing.

Hands traced the muscles of Emily's toned stomach, gripping and releasing her hips. The leg JJ was straddling jerked, causing JJ to swallow. Maybe Emily was more prepared for this than she had anticipated. Fingers skated above the waistband of her underwear, and Emily was tempted to order JJ to hurry up. Her temptation got the better of her. "Jen, please."

"Hmmm?" she muttered with a small smile. JJ could feel her own walls clenching at the sight of Emily beneath her, restrained and begging for release. Grinding herself on the thigh between her own would send her over the edge before Emily, and she had barely been touched. Her fingers easily bypassed the thin material, and were immediately met with a slick wetness. It wouldn't take much to push Emily over the edge, but JJ wanted to take her time.

"I need you." Emily glared playfully and bucked her hips. JJ had to take a moment to recover, after the breath was knocked from her lungs as Emily's toned thigh pushed up just as she rocked, sending a large wave of pleasure through the blondes body. "Patience, baby." Her thumb stroked Emily's clit, who had to squeeze her eyes shut at the unexpected touch. She continued to stimulate the bundle of nerves under her fingers, pinching and pulling at the bud. There was a violent snapping of the cuffs. Emily's eyes were glazing over and her movements were erratic; chest heaving, legs quivering between JJ's, entire body arching off the bed.

JJ had to brace herself on the mattress as she abruptly stopped rocking herself towards her own ecstasy. A lone finger dipped into the velvet heat between Emily's legs, no further than the first knuckle. Emily watched from her place on the bed as JJ's sticky covered finger met the tip of her tongue, and her eyes slid shut at the taste. Her tongue wet her own lips unconsciously just as JJ moaned, savouring the flavour that was Emily. "You taste so good." Emily whimpered again. The blonde's free hand landed on the pillow next to Emily's head.

The liaison bit her lip and pulled back just out of reach from the lips that were begging for a kiss. "Uh-uh." JJ made a beeline for that spot on Emily's neck, nudging her head to the side for better access. Emily huffed when her body shifted with the movement of JJ picking up the rocking of her hips. "Stop teasing me, Jennifer." JJ only stopped nipping at Emily's neck when she was satisfied with the angry red mark that was marring the pale skin. Pulling back, she raised a questioning eyebrow, only to be met with a quick nod. Their lips were mashed together, the blonde swallowing the moans of pleasure with her tongue, two of her fingers sliding into the slick arousal.

Her fingers went as deep as possible, curling slightly as the tips searched for Emily's g-spot. Simultaneously, both woman rocked their hips; Emily against JJ's hand, and the blond against the thigh she was straddling. JJ thrust into Emily at a slow pace, taking in the feeling of Emily clenching around her fingers for the first time. Her own hips were matching the pace she created as the thigh jerked and quivered. Emily broke away from the kiss, her lungs burning from the lack of oxygen, and she drew in a large breath. She struggled with the cuffs as JJ nuzzled her cheek.

The blonde could feel Emily's walls around her fingers tighten, and her forearm muscles began to burn as she added a third finger and increased her speed. They had found a rhythm between the two of them; the bucking of Emily's hips providing the right around of pressure against JJ's clit, as the blondes thumb rubbed the nerves. JJ's body began to shake, her hips rolling over the muscles as fast as she could. Above the sound of their breathing and the clanking of the cuffs, the bed had begun hitting the wall with the force of Emily's resistance and rocking, and JJ's thrusts. The tightness that was beginning to coil deep inside Emily, was close to cracking loose.

Emily went over the edge after simply a few more minutes, JJ hitting the spot with every push of her fingers against the tightness as she shuddered violently. The brunette's eyes snapped open. "Jay!" Her orgasm washed through her body, beginning in the pit of her stomach and then spreading to the tips of her toes. JJ's fingers will still moving within her, slowing down to let her ride out the waves. JJ came with a breathy cry into Emily's ear, her body close to collapsing in exhaustion. She kissed the temple her forehead had been resting against and nibbled at Emily's earlobe. There was a kiss just below her jaw, and JJ enjoyed the salty taste of the skin that was covered in a think sheen of sweat.

Both bodies were still shaking when JJ pressed their lips together, smiling when Emily requested entry into her mouth. JJ pulled her fingers out with a wet pop and sat up, feeling an aftershock rip through her body. She lifted her hand to her mouth and licked her fingers clean, moaning at the taste of Emily. JJ lowered herself to lie beside Emily, who was still cuffed to the bed frame, and slung a leg over her girlfriend's waist. Emily turned her head and shared a brief kiss with the blonde. "I love you, Emily Prentiss."

Emily let out a rare smile, and attempted to wrap an arm around JJ, but she was still restrained. She began rattling the cuffs. JJ had to raise herself up onto her knees by Emily's ribs, her hands brushing through Emily's hair and cupping her face to get her attention and calm her down. Calmly and quietly, she asked, "would you like me to undo the cuffs?"

"Please," she begged. JJ nodded and kept a comforting hand on the woman's arm as she covered Emily with the covers and reached for the keys in the top drawer of her bedside table. Within seconds, Emily had one wrist free and was pushing herself to sit up. As soon as her left wrist was free, her eyes were closed in defeat and she was slumped over. JJ pressed a kiss to the bare shoulder in front of her before shuffling under the covers and lying on her side.

She pressed her lips to Emily's softly, before wrapping an arm around the brunette and spooning her. Her chin sat on the shoulder in front of her. "I love you."

"I love you too," she smiled, settling into the embrace and closing her eyes.

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><p>JJ padded into the kitchen late the next morning, in search of Emily and a fix for her caffeine addiction. She was brushing loose strands of hair out of her face, ones that she had missed when tying it up earlier, when she spotted Emily cradling a nearly empty mug, sitting on the small island and staring blankly out the small window above the sink into the backyard. She was sporting JJ's discarded tank top from the night before. The blonde stopped by the counter and folded her arms, curious to see how long it would take her girlfriend before she was noticed. Watching with a soft smile, Emily looked completely sated, calm and brave, and ready to fight all of her demons at once. JJ was proud of her.<p>

It was a few minutes of admiring the other woman until she was noticed, and Emily placed her lukewarm coffee onto the bench and motioning for JJ with her arms and a smile. JJ walked forward to stand between Emily's legs, her arms slinking around the waist in front of her. Hands came to cup her neck and gently pulled her into a kiss, which they both smiled. After pulling back, JJ snuck a sip of Emily's coffee, nearly choking on it when she spotted the raw, bruises circling around her wrists, slightly darker patches on each side. The blonde took the marred wrists in her hands, gently tracing over the skin and peppered her lips over the bruises.

"A wise man once told me that 'scars remind us where we've been. They don't have to dictate where we're going.' Besides, maybe next time we can use some whipped cream and chocolate sauce," she smirked, before pulling a laughing JJ into a kiss.


End file.
